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MINI COOPER - Auto Express
01.06.2001 |
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The God of Small Things by Matthew Franey
Not a lot of people will know what you're about to read. That's because not a lot of people outside of BMW have driven the new MINI. But, as a world exclusive, we've sneaked under the wraps that BMW has so strenuously been yanking around the car. And we have the keys. To a Cooper. Ready for a few surprises?
The first one comes the very first moment you thud shut those heavy doors - doors that could have been lifted straight from a BMW. This car is solid. There's a resonant quality, too, in those initial whirrs of the starter, beat of the engine and unmissable burbling pulse as rushing exhaust gases head for the exit. Better still, wriggle down into the low-slung leather seat and give the throttle a sharp prod. That sharp, crackling overrun? What are you waiting for?
Sitting in an all-new MINI Cooper is a surreal experience. Even more so for the fact that this drive is as hush-hush as you can imagine - a clandestine journey that means every nuance and characteristic of the car needs immediate assessment. There will be no second chance. So take first gear and note in the process that a pleasingly snappy push is needed to engage the ratio. The Mini moves off without drama. It's the least flustered thing here.
This drive story will probably make equally surreal reading to all those who took their driving test in an Issigonis-era MINI; perhaps ran a rusting, hulking one through college, or wedged themselves into the back of Granny's runabout for a weekend trip to Morecombe. New MINI is making a somewhat different statement than its utilitarian predecessor.
The unmissable fact here is that, although this car had a rather tortured genesis (Rover, which began development, was lanced from the Munich portfolio mid-project), this is very much a baby BMW. That may offend the MINI traditionalists, but it's of paramount importance in understanding what this car is all about. And, of course, what you will drive out of the dealership.
As new trustees of the MINI legend, there's considerable pressure on BMW to make a lasting impression with this new car. Owning automotive icons brings equal responsibility to bear on those who seek to redesign them. No-one really took the hatchet to Volkswagen when the new Beetle metamorphosed from a Golf chassis, but it didn't take a design genius to spot that while Beetle One was a masterpiece of engineering simplicity, Beetle Two was a marketing showcase, all style over substance.
It's why BMW has been so serious about getting this car right first time around, and makes the paranoia that has surrounded the development much more understandable. And that seriousness shows.
The hand of BMW is apparent from the moment you cast a serious eye over the exterior detailing and complex engineering that is unheard of in a car that starts, don't forget, at £10,300 for the base MINI One. That broad, cartoonish bonnet is pressed, clam-like, from one huge piece of metal, hinging up towards the screen, headlights and all. The two-tone paintwork - especially trick in our Cooper model's red body and white roof - is thoughtfully and eye-catchingly applied. Why don't more car makers offer their product in split colours? Those doors, released with a squeeze of a cool alloy sliver, breeze open and thud shut in identical fashion to any 3 Series. And, as we've said, they're heavy. You'd have a hard time blowing the bloody things off...
But it's the inside that makes you stop and take stock of exactly what you are sitting in. When CAR first got access to new MINI last year, we described the interior as an amalgam of Audi TT and Rover 75. It's an apt comparison. At first sight it's hard to take in the plethora of styling tricks, design touches and all-round neatness of the car's cabin. To start with, from the front seats at least, it's surprisingly airy. There's excellent headroom and visibility is significantly better than you might think from its high-shouldered, shallow-roofed stance. Even the low-slung seating position doesn't interfere with what will be an uncompromised cockpit during those bumper-to-bumper urban crawls. Get the optional full-width sliding sunroof thrown in and you'll keep having to remind yourself that this car is called MINI.
There's overt quality, too, in the switchgear and layout of the dash. The indicator and wiper stalks are Flash Gordon-esque rockets, while a row of silver toggle switches at the bottom of the centre console may only operate electric windows, fog lamps and the like, but they'll give you that Monte Carlo Rally feeling every time you flick one up or down. In a parody of the original MINI, the speedo takes centre stage, too: a giant moon face plopped halfway between driver and co- driver... sorry, passenger. If you want the optional revcounter, it clips (also in racing MINI style) onto the top of the steering column.
Even the seats take the game into a different league from anything you might find in a 10 grand hatch: sculptured, curving and let down only by a rather saggy-fitting Cooper sports leather option. In standard cloth trim they look, and feel, spot on, with adjustment for height an essential feature for the shorter among us.
Passenger safety is unimpeachable, too. As standard you get all-round disc brakes with ABS, brake force distribution and Cornering Brake Control. There's a tyre pressure warning indicator and front and side airbags with occupant detection system for both driver and passenger. You can add head airbags, BMW's effective Dynamic Stability Control and even run-flat tyres.
Not everything's perfect, of course. Splash out on satellite navigation and you'll sacrifice the central speedometer for a rectangular computer screen, which rather bizarrely retains the circular border, giving a distinct square peg/round hole feeling. Some of the knobs and buttons on the base model feel less solid, too. There's a distinct drop-off in quality, for some reason, between the nice clunky controls of the climate control system and the rather flaky, wobbly set that comes with the standard air-con/blower unit.
Your enthusiasm will wane a little further should you try to sit in the back. Design compromises (the complicated rear suspension, for starters) and that rather cab-back profile mean it's probably better to treat the bench seat as a chaise longue. Slide the front chairs all the way back and they're actually touching the rears.
Boot space, too, is not in the Peugeot 206 class, with 160 litres of emptiness, which translates into probably four or five Sainsbury's bags with room left over to slip your copy of Bridget Jones's Diary down the side. Rear seats will fold down (some of the way, at least) but don't go expecting to wedge in a Portobello Road wardrobe.
When Issigonis penned the original car, his placing of the wheels at all four corners had as much to do with releasing internal space as it did with creating the squat, wide-tracked feel that introduced people to the fun of driving. With new MINI, designer Frank Stephenson has stayed true to the Issigonis rule of thumb. However, he's been helped by the use of modern simulation techniques that mean the 21st century version has more than twice as much torsional rigidity than any other car in its class. In layman's terms, that should mean more of that kart-like feel that people remember of old.
The Cooper, more solidly sprung than MINI One, is just that - solid - and the class-leading stiffness in the chassis is apparent from the moment you tug down on the thick-rimmed leather wheel, the changes of direction accompanied by little in the way of body roll or lean. But that kart impression? Not so sure. Make a beeline for a corner and first impressions are good, the steering meaty in your hands and providing distinct resistance as it weights up over the course of its 2.5 turns from either lock. In many ways, its mid-corner manners resemble VW's Lupo GTI: set, squat and certainly chunky. But it's not all good news, for the Cooper is somewhat prone to understeer, those wide 195/55 R16 front tyres (or perhaps overly firm front suspension) unable to provide enough grip should you carry ample speed into the bend.
Outright velocity itself is also going to be an issue, for that unremarkable, unflustered progress from standstill is hard to shake off regardless of how aggressively you work the throttle. If anything, the lack of fuss is almost a disappointment. The Cooper's engine is tuned to eke 25 more horsepower out of its 1.6 litres than the equivalent base level MINI One - 115bhp against 90 - but, weighing in at 1050kg, it doesn't hint at electrifying acceleration, and the figures bear that out. The Cooper crosses the 62mph barrier in 9.2sec, the MINI One in 10.9.
Apply more right foot and the engine, free-revving and always rorty, seems to have the flattest of torque curves. The Cooper unit releases 108lb ft at 4500rpm, and while its delivery is linear and without hiccup, there's no real step up in performance as the revs rise. Take it round to 6000rpm (maximum power output) and you're left wondering at what point things are going to start happening. It's certainly not slow, but there's none of the rawness of some sporting superminis and certainly no dramas in the way in which that 115bhp is put down through the optional 16-inch alloys.
It's what goes on around the hard-working engine that imbues you with a sense of sporting MNI. The gearshift is very positive and a clear indicator again of big car mentality in a small car frame. The throw is short and firm, the outsized round gearknob feeding sensation directly from transmission casing to the palm of your hand.
What is also without reproach is the manner in which the Cooper oozes ride quality. BMW has employed its complex Z-axle suspension from the 3-series in the MINI (it's the reason why you're so pushed for space in the back) and the system shows its worth as speeds increase. The suspension damping exhibits considerable finesse, maintaining poise over humpback bridges, reducing any pitter-patter from rougher surfaces to little more than a gentle hum from the front rubber. The impression is of a car that will waft you on far longer journeys than you might ever have considered in something of equivalent size. It's where the baby BMW tag is most deserved. And the point at which old MINI owners will be stopping to scratch their heads.
What should we think of this new icon? Well, understanding new MINI is a matter of managing your expectations; trying to appreciate what a MINI in 2001 should be. Every time you feel obliged to criticise this car, it's worth stopping to reflect on exactly what the team behind it has achieved. In terms of the racy, basic, fun-a-minute car that we're used to, there are compromises. There were always going to be. But as a tool to go head to head with the Lupos and Saxos of the world, this is an incredible achievement.
Ultimately, when 10 grand will get you BMW build quality and engineering, style as well as substance, and an equipment list and safety spec that reads like the brochure to a car costing twice the price, then the cat is well and truly among the pigeons. New MINI may be the same size as any of its rivals, but its effect on the world of the small car might just be very large indeed.